Need advice on my sex addict husband.

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Need advice on my sex addict husband.

Postby Nicky43 » Mon Dec 23, 2019 12:16 am

Ive never posted on a forum like this before, but I need advice on my husband who has been diagnosed with a sex addicton, from people who are either going through it themselves, or who are sex addicts. Since finding out about all his infidelities during our 23 year relationship, I have been feeling depressed, anxious, angry and very insecure. It feels as though my whole marriage has been a lie, and that I have wasted my time on someone who was only with me to make himself look good. My husband has recieved counselling for his addiction and he has admitted that his behaviour isnt "normal", and goes looking for sex in order to boost his self esteem. I havent recieved any counselling, mainly because I cant afford the cost, but I need to talk to someone who understands and give me non judgemental advice, something a friend wont do. Basically im struggling with the concept that my husband has never really truely loved me or never felt emotionally close to me, how could he when he was seeking this from other women. From what I understand of sex addiction, sex addicts turn to sex when they feel emotionally distressed because they feel unable to cope with thier feelings like a healthy person, and so therefore finds it difficult to form close emotional bonds with others. This to me gives the impresion that my husband was uncapable of truely loving me, which makes me question as to if he ever has during the 23 years we have been together. My husband has said to me that we should start again from fresh, like we have only just meet and date again etc, and forget about what has happened. This suggets to me that although he is willing to try again to save our marriage, and maybe he does love me now, and his behaviour towards me has changed for the better and he appears to be more loving, but I dont want to stay with a man who didnt love me before. Can a sex addict in the midst of their addiction truely love their partner ? .I feel so angry and betrayed right now, my husband wont reveal to me the full extent if his addiction and his counselling has finished. I am scared of letting him back in, in fear of him letting me down again. How can I get over this as a partner of a sex addict?Do sex addicts really love their patners ?
Nicky43
 
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